non-fiction – Reading Our Shelves

“Badass Stories: Grit, Growth, Hope, and Healing in the Shitshow” by Jodie Eckleberry-Hunt – Review

By: Angie Haddock

“Badass Stories” is all about the grit of survival in tough times, the growth that comes from pain, the hope for something better, and the healing that happens along the way. It is a compilation of short stories that illustrate some of the most important lessons I’ve learned about life from the real people in my life and my psychology practice.

–Goodreads

This is the third new book I’ve reviewed from this author, and I actually read this one months ahead of its release so I could offer her publisher a “blurb.” This is the one I submitted:

“Badass Stories” is Jodie Eckleberry-Hunt’s most personal book yet – and it also manages to be the most universal. There is (at least) one story inside that will resonate with every reader.

And I hold to that opinion!

The author breaks the book up into four parts, with chapters focusing on grit, growth, hope, and healing. These are stories from her years studying and then working in psychology. The stories feature many patients with different backgrounds and stories, obviously… but what I found more interesting is that, often, it is Eckleberry-Hunt who learns a lesson in these chapters.

Some of these may seem like they are tied to her role as a therapist, but I believe they can be useful for many of us. Lessons like sticking to boundaries, or not being able to will someone else to change, are probably ones we have all had experience with. How she goes about being able to help her clients – or NOT help them, in some cases – are the parts that I found both personal (to her) and universal.

The clients’ stories themselves are at turns heartbreaking, frustrating, and triumphant. Please note: these people are dealing with heavy things. Veterans with PTSD, parents who have lost a child, domestic abuse, substance abuse, and more are represented here. If these sorts of topics are too triggering for you, consider this your warning.

Because there are so many different topics, though, I found myself drawn into each story for different reasons. Sure, some may have reminded me of myself… but just as many brought to mind friends, family members, etc. I kept thinking of the many people I could pass my copy on to, because so many of us will find something within the pages that comes close to some aspect of our own stories.

This one comes out on February 14th, and is available for pre-order now. I was given an early copy from the author and her publisher, Turner Publishing.

Related Reviews:

Getting to Good Riddance

Move On Motherf*cker

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“Woman, Captain, Rebel” by Margaret Willson – Review

By: Angie Haddock

A daring and magnificent account of Iceland’s most famous female sea captain who constantly fought for women’s rights and equality—and who also solved one of the country’s most notorious robberies.

–Goodreads

Last year, I read a handful of non-fiction books about badass females… albeit, some better written than others. One was even written by the first lady of Iceland! So the reasons this book appealed to me should be obvious.

This is the story of Thurídur Einarsdóttir, who was born on the Southwest shores of Iceland in the late 1700s. She lived a long life, from 1777 to 1863, and spent all of it in roughly the same region. (Although she did take to traveling in her later years, it was all still within Iceland).

Thurídur was born to a poor family, and while she was very young, the area suffered from a volcanic ash-induced famine. Her dad refused a lodger, as they had no food in the house to offer him, but this was a cardinal sin in their culture. The lodger supposedly cursed his family for nine generations.

And here our story begins.

Despite the curse, Thurídur did fairly well for herself. She learned to fish as a young teen, and developed a knack for being able to read the coming weather. As her fishing skills grew, she became highly sought after as a deckhand, and even outearned many men on her boats. She was eventually hired to captain other people’s boats, even, and was trusted among the boat owners and the fishermen (and women) under her care. In fact, in 52 years of fishing, it is said that she never lost a crew member.

While she did not have much trouble getting her crew to respect her knowledge of the sea, she still did face some discrimination in life. She was known to wear trousers everywhere except to church, and later she added a top hat to her ensemble (just because she liked it!). She also did a lot of farming when it was the season for it, and could scythe hay with the strongest of men. So of course, some were put off by her way of living.

She was married a few times, and had one daughter who died in childhood. She later adopted her sister’s daughter, who was disabled. In her later years, she spent all of her money trying to make sure her niece would be taken care of after her own death… and that niece did live to be 89 years old!

We spend a lot of time in her home village getting to know all the townspeople, as she does interact with them constantly – both on land and at sea. So by the time a very brazen robbery happens, we have established that Thurídur knows everyone. A county commissioner is sent to town to investigate, and – not knowing the townspeople himself – immediately pushes her for her thoughts on it. (This set-up definitely made me think of the BBC’s “Broadchurch.” Anyone else?) She doesn’t want to implicate her friends, but starts pointing out clues the commissioner missed. This leads to confessions, and four area men being sent to prison in Denmark (which ruled over Iceland at the time).

After the convictions, Thurídur has a tougher time with her neighbors. Several make threats, and someone even goes so far as to set fire to a boat in her care. She still has many allies, also, and they try to help her. Eventually, she is forced to move to a bigger city nearby, where she starts out working in a shop. She also starts acting as a tour guide, leading travelers through the nearby mountains to other villages and cities. She remains lively and sharp into old age, but ultimately ends up destitute anyway (because she spends all her money on her niece).

This is a great story, and well written. There is drama, action, and politics.

When I first got this as an advanced reader’s copy, it was set to publish on January 31st of this year… but the date moved, and this book has already come out! We’ll still call it a new release, though. I read it thanks to Netgalley and the publisher, Sourcebooks.

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“The Girl Explorers” by Jayne E. Zanglein – Review

By: Angie Haddock

The Girl Explorers is the inspirational and untold story of the founding of the Society of Women Geographers―an organization of adventurous female world explorers―and how key members served as early advocates for human rights and paved the way for today’s women scientists by scaling mountains, exploring the high seas, flying across the Atlantic, and recording the world through film, sculpture, and literature.

–Goodreads

I’ve delved into a lot of stories about badass, historical women this year! This one seemed like a perfect fit with that theme. And, while the individual stories were often interesting… the book as a whole was frustrating.

The author introduces us to an actual society that existed (and still exists) for women explorers. It was founded because, at the time, women were excluded from other similar societies/professional groups. And yet, women were going on travel expeditions, writing books about their travels, and more!

One of the ongoing themes that really struck a chord is that, often, women were part of bigger (co-ed) expeditions that men took all the credit for. They helped write (or type, or edit) the travel books that had men’s names attached as the sole author. Or they took all the photographs. Sometimes these men were their husbands or lovers, but not always.

As I said, the individual stories were often interesting. Some members whose names are still known include Margaret Mead and Amelia Earhart, for example. Others traveled to Asia and South America; some were artists, divers, filmmakers, or mountain climbers. The book also delves into the suffragist movement a little.

This brings me to one of the missteps I felt like this book took… as it went on, it started bringing up all kinds of social movements of the time, including the plights of other races and of the LGBT community. Most of the women of the Society were white women of some means (at least enough to travel regularly), and tying their causes to some of these other ones seemed like it was treading close to becoming a “white savior” narrative.

The author tries to tie every story/chapter to the next, and often these transitions seem forced. Also, as some women were older than others, the stories skip back and forth in time, making these transitions even more wonky. The book as a whole didn’t feel like it had a great flow, if you will. Of course, this is just my opinion.

Overall, I’m glad I pushed my way through this one. I was happy to learn about some of these women, and their work, many of whom I had not read about before. But as a whole, the book felt a little like “work” to get through.

I was able to read this one for free through the Sourcebooks Early Reads program.

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“The Woman They Could Not Silence” by Kate Moore – Review

By: Angie Haddock

1860: As the clash between the states rolls slowly to a boil, Elizabeth Packard, housewife and mother of six, is facing her own battle. The enemy sits across the table and sleeps in the next room. Her husband of twenty-one years is plotting against her because he feels increasingly threatened – by Elizabeth’s intellect, independence, and unwillingness to stifle her own thoughts. So Theophilus makes a plan to put his wife back in her place. One summer morning, he has her committed to an insane asylum.

–Goodreads

This was both a fascinating and frustrating read! It tells the true story of Elizabeth Packard, and most of the story takes place in the 1860s.

When we first meet Packard, she is already at odds with her husband of 20-some years, Theophilus. (Even his name is perfect for him, as he’s a preacher.) They share five children, the youngest of whom is just barely out of infancy.

Elizabeth Packard is fairly educated, and she’s been reading. But more than that, she’s been thinking on her own. Specifically, her husband had been affiliated with a more liberal/modern branch of Presbyterianism, but had recently switched to a more conservative branch. Elizabeth didn’t love the “fire and brimstone” lectures, and was disillusioned with this branch because they were against the abolition of slavery. So, she had begun speaking up in some of the church groups that she belonged to. Her husband was the minister, so her disagreeing openly with his views was just not acceptable.

So Theophilus sends Elizabeth to the state’s insane asylum. This facility had patients of both genders, but Elizabeth really only sees the women’s side of things. The man in charge is Dr. Andrew McFarland, who is well respected in his field. (Of course, the idea of treating mental health issues was very much in its infancy, and there were many differing views on it at the time.)

At first, McFarland is friendy toward Elizabeth. She is put in a decent room, and allowed special privileges like walking the grounds unaccompanied. She feels sure the doctor will see that she is obviously sane, and will allow her to leave in mere months. He does encourage this belief at first. But when Elizabeth does not leave, she starts using her privilege to speak up about things she witnesses, and is eventually put into a different ward… where she witnesses even worse things.

She ends up being there for several years, and her status there goes back and forth. She often has friends on the inside – disgruntled staff, usually – who are willing to help her get letters out and such. But she also finds that McFarland intercepts any incoming letters, so she never knows if her friends on the outside are willing to help. She also knows that she can only be let go into the care of her husband, while still married. But if she asks for a divorce, Theophilus would get custody of the children. There is no easy wins in her forseeable future, because she is, in essence, her husband’s property.

Even when Elizabeth does get released from the asylum – by a board of trustees, not McFarland – we know her fight is far from over (mostly because there’s still a lot of book left!). She initially gets free from Theophilus, only to go back by her own volition because she wants to see her children. She ends up locked up again, but is eventually able to stand trial to determine if she is actually insane or not.

She also starts self-publishing her writings on her time in the asylum. This is important for two reasons. Firstly, she starts making her own money, so she can be financially self-reliant. Secondly, she brings light to the issues in the asylum there, and in asylums in general, which starts getting the public interested in the matter. This leads to her eventually touring across the country advocating for both patient’s rights and women’s rights, mostly in state legislatures.

This is an incredible, infuriating, and ultimately redeeming read. I was able to read it for free through Sourcebooks Early Reads, but it’s available everywhere.

(Don’t forget, I keep a bookshelf of books I’ve reviewed here on Bookshop.org, too, if you’re looking for your own copy!)

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“Killers of the Flower Moon” by David Grann – Review

By: Angie Haddock

In the 1920s, the richest people per capita in the world were members of the Osage Indian Nation in Oklahoma. After oil was discovered beneath their land, the Osage rode in chauffeured automobiles, built mansions, and sent their children to study in Europe.

Then, one by one, they began to be killed off. One Osage woman, Mollie Burkhart, watched as her family was murdered. And it was just the beginning, as more Osage began to die under mysterious circumstances.

A true-life murder mystery about one of the most monstrous crimes in American history.

–Goodreads

This one has been on my TBR for a few years now, and it’s becoming a movie next year (Scorsese! DiCaprio!), so I thought it was finally time to tackle it. And boy, I was not disappointed!

The full title is “Killers of the Flower Moon: The Osage Murders and the Birth of the FBI.”

The story takes place mostly in Oklahoma in the 1920s. The author tells of a single murder first, and then branches outward to several more that happened in the same geographical area. We then step back and look at what’s going on in the area, because there are multiple possible motives at play.

First of all, the Osage tribe was forced onto this patch of land by dealings with the federal government in previous generations. Later, oil was found under the land, making it very valuable. This was also the era of prohibition, and with it, the birth of real organized crime nationwide. How much did racism, oil, money, or general lawlessness have to do with the killings of members of the Osage?

The local lawmen and private eyes who tried to look into individual murders seemed to get nowhere, so eventually some federal lawmen were assigned to uncover the truth. These men worked under J. Edgar Hoover, in what would go on to become the FBI. The head of this crew was Tom White, and he got to pick his underlings. Most of them worked undercover, to try to cozy up to locals – both Indigenous and white – to find out what everyone really knew.

In addition to the obvious killings – people who were shot, for example – there were also a lot of Indigenous who would die from unexplained illnesses, or supposed drunkenness. This lead some to believe that there were additional murders that were carried out by poisoning.

Eventually, the team came up with suspects in at least a few of the murders. Once the drama moved into the courtroom, many witnesses went back and forth on their statements, as they are continuously bribed or threatened. There was no guarantee that the suspects would really end up behind bars.

And even then, the government treated the case like it was successfully closed. But were the same few men responsible for all the killings? How many others could have been involved?

There is a final part of this book, in which the author tries to uncover those last questions. Ultimately – and not surprisingly – it seemed like there were many more people involved than those who were brought to justice.

This is a riveting true story, which I definitely don’t remember learning about in U.S. history classes! The topics at play – race, class, land rights, etc. – are still ones we grapple with today. I would recommend this one to anyone interested in history, social justice, or true crime.

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“Getting to Good Riddance” by Jodie Eckleberry-Hunt – Review

By: Angie Haddock

Psychologist Jodie Eckleberry-Hunt, author of Move on Motherf*cker: Live, Laugh, and Let Sh*t Go, provides the tools to survive and thrive after a breakup in this empowering, BS-free guide… This seriously motivational guide utilizes salty straight talk, humor, cognitive behavioral therapy, mindfulness, and positivity to get you to growth and recovery. Overcome self-defeat, smash the sh*t out of heartbreak, and get ready to move on, motherf*cker!

–Goodreads

The full title of this one is “Getting to Good Riddance: A No-Bullsh*t Breakup Survival Guide.” I’m coming up on my seventh wedding anniversary, so having this one laying around caused a few looks! The first Advanced Reader Copy I reviewed for this blog was by Jodie Eckleberry-Hunt, though, and she graciously kept me on her email list for future releases. I love cultivating relationships with authors through my work here, so how could I resist reading her latest release?

Like in her previous release, the author explains the science behind her methodology in the first few chapters. These include using Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), mindfulness, positive psychology, humor, and profanity to recognize negative self-talk and pivot away from it when it is not serving you.

I did find some of the content of these chapters repetitive, especially when it came to explaining her “MOMF” theory. Maybe that’s because I read the book on that one already? But, the idea is to use profanity as a source of both humor and venting. In this one, she repeatedly mentions that it’s not meant to be derogatory toward yourself. I feel like, if someone is uncomfortable with swearing, they probably won’t pick up a book with the word “bullshit” on the cover. Just my two cents.

The rest of the chapters tackle various issues that could come up in/after a breakup. We start in the immediate aftermath, when you’re in survival mode. Then, we’re introduced to the steps of the grief process, which are likely to come into play here. Next, she introduces us to different theories on what love actually is and isn’t. Next are chapters on specific cases: infidelity, and dealing with “bad actors” (narcissists, sociopaths, dependents, abusers). Then come the chapters on moving forward: creating boundaries, preparing/planning to leave a bad situation, finding peace, learning to live within our own happiness, and realizing our messed up core beliefs that got us into the situation (so we don’t repeat the same mistakes).

If you are looking for a tangible way to help a friend who is reeling from a breakup or divorce – and that friend has a good tolerance for swearing and humor – this would be a nice little gift. I’d think of it as a way to support growth without inserting yourself directly in the friend’s personal business.

This book comes out today, July 26th, 2022. Thanks to Jodie Eckleberry-Hunt for the opportunity to read it ahead of time.

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“Warda” by Warda Mohamed Abdullahi – Review

By: Angie Haddock

Set in the rugged shrublands of rural Ethiopia, the contentious neighborhoods of South Africa, and the icy streets of Michigan, Warda is the story of a fierce young woman on a tireless quest to become the first member of her family to go to college.

-Goodreads

This book is so good! It’s not a long read, anyway, but the amazing tales within it makes it go fast.

Near the beginning, before we really get to know the main character, we learn about her family. Warda doesn’t even remember her mother, who died when she was just a baby. Because of financial woes and ethnic prejudices, her father was living away from Warda and her mom. But when baby Warda got sick, her mom was determined to take her back to where she was born to get medical help. While crossing the Red Sea, the boat they were in capsized. Her uncle was also aboard, and found Warda floating on a blanket. He also found her mom, but she was already deceased. Her father didn’t even know they were traveling.

And that’s only the beginning.

Her dad takes Warda to his father’s farm, where she is raised with many aunts, uncles, and cousins of all ages. She thinks of her grandpa as her father, and does not understand that he is not. She faces several dangers – often in the form of wild animals trying to attack their herd of sheep – but gets no formal schooling. When she is ten years old, her dad wants her to move to South Africa so she can start receiving an education. The trip there takes her a little over a year.

Of course, even after arriving there, Warda has a big challenge to her education: she speaks none of the languages that classes are held in in most of the schools around her.

After only a few years, her family has to move again. This time, they’re taking a big leap to come to the United States. When they land in Michigan, there is already snow on the ground – something Warda has zero experience with.

She also has another new language to learn. She wants to learn to drive. She needs to learn to navigate not only her American high school… but college applications, scholarship essays, SAT and ACT prep, and being away from others who share her culture and religion.

Thankfully, Warda is assigned a mentor who helps her immensely. With her mentor’s gift of keeping Warda organized, and her own passion for wanting to get to college, they come up with a plan to get Warda through high school in only a few years. To make up for lost time, she often has to take extra classes online and in the summer. She has to really push hard to get to her dream… which is to ultimately become a doctor.

If I had to describe this book in one word, I’d pick: triumphant. You’ll be hooked from the early scenes of Warda’s life, and you’ll want to cheer her on through so many more adventures and obstacles.

This book was independently published over a year ago, but the team at Books Forward is promoting it now to coincide with World Refugee Day. World Refugee Day is celebrated on June 20th, and you can learn more about it here.

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“Secrets of the Sprakkar” by Eliza Reid – Review

By: Angie Haddock

For the past twelve years, the World Economic Forum’s Global Gender Gap Report has ranked Iceland number one on its list of countries closing the gap in equality between men and women. What is it about Iceland that enables its society to make such meaningful progress in this ongoing battle, from electing the world’s first female president to passing legislation specifically designed to help even the playing field at work and at home?

–Goodreads

This non-fiction does have a lot of stats in it, but it still manages to be quite fun. It was written by the current First Lady, who is originally from Canada. So, her personal perspectives include those of a mother, public figure, and immigrant… aside from being a woman herself, obviously.

But Reid doesn’t rely solely on her own experiences and some easy-to-dig-up statistics – she interviews dozens of women from around the island, famous and not, on a variety of topics. She also intersperses these larger chapters with smaller stories from Icleland’s history.

The bigger topics include: parenting, networking, Iceland’s views on sex, women in corporate roles, the media, working outdoors, the arts (and sports), immigrant and minority women, and politics.

As Reid points out in the final pages, everyone she interviews can easily fit into multiple categories.

Obviously, the gender equality concept here intrigued me. But I have to admit, what made this book actually fun to read was learning about Iceland! The terrain, customs, and culture seem very different than those of the US.

For example, would we even need a whole chapter on working outdoors? But, much of their economy comes from agriculture and fishing, so it’s an important distinction for them that women can do these jobs, too. (Especially on fishing boats that don’t have bathrooms, where one is expected to “go over the edge.”)

I loved that, in the chapter on politics, one of Reid’s interviewees was heading up a student council at a large university. I think we tend to think of those sorts of things as opportunities to learn, or stepping stones to a future job (perhaps in politics, or not)… but we don’t treat our young people like they’re equals, already doing important work. So, even who was chosen to be interviewed shows how different their outlook on these topics are from our own.

If you’re up for a book with quite a few stats, and really long names, this is an interesting read. I realize, though, that those things aren’t going to appeal to everyone.

I was able to read this book for free through the Sourcebooks Early Reads program.

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“Coyote Gratitude” by Julie Haberstick – Review

By: Angie Haddock

Nearly thirty and disconnected, Julie Haberstick was staring at an endless loop of traffic and toxic relationships. Heeding a quiet intuition, she left her fiancé, packed her life into her car, and — on October 1st, 2019 — just started driving.

–Goodreads

Happy June! Now that the summer months are here (in the US, anyway), how about a quick road trip book?

Julie Haberstick’s journey started in California, with the rebellious act of getting all her hair cut off. She then travels east, through the Southern United States. She’s a poet at heart, and finds a few open mics, where she shares her poems out loud and meets other like-minded people. Along the way, she also picks up a ukulele.

This book is a travel journal – edited, of course. While some entries tell of her adventures, others are merely a picture or a poem.

Haberstick finds herself entranced be New Orleans, and the artsy people she meets there. She continues her journey by making her way up and down the East Coast. She has friends and family in various states here, and also some events to attend for said friends and family, so she goes back and forth some. We get to meet some members of her family, and even get a poem by her mom!

All the while, she keeps thinking back on New Orleans, though. Her original travels are supposed to take her to the end of 2019, but she tacks on another month in NOLA in January, 2020.

She decides to stay, and then the pandemic hits. This makes it hard to meet new people in her new city, but she’s already made a few good contacts. By the time October rolls around again, she’s contemplating whether or not she’s ready for commitment. But her original road trip started the previous October, and she wants to celebrate that. So she decides that her next big adventure will be a commitment, after all – and she adopts a puppy.

(For those wondering, like I was… Julie and her pup are still together, and still in New Orleans.)

I think we’ve all has those moments when we fantasize about dropping everything and starting over… right? Whether you’ve done it, or just thought about it, this short read may be your cup of tea.

I was given a copy of this book by the author, and the kind folks at the Books Forward program.

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“Women Warriors From History” by H.G. Hicks – Review

By: Angie Haddock

Are you tired of the lack of female representation in history books and stories and wish your little lady had the example of some inspiring women to look up to?

In many areas, women can now achieve whatever their hearts desire for the first time in history… And yet not know how far they can go due to lack of historical example.

Women Warriors from History gives young, female readers the inspiration and motivation to fight for what they believe in.

–Reedsy

The full title of this one is “Women Warriors From History: Badass Divas to Inspire Your Little Lady” – and already, I was left with more questions than answers! The use of “little lady” bothered me right from the start, as it sounds both antiquated and belittling. So is this book for… possessive men? Parents? It starts off talking about school textbooks, so I assume it’s actually aimed at young readers themselves. So, what’s up with this title?

The question of audience doesn’t stop there, as the author continuously uses the term “Badass Divas” to talk about the subjects of the book. Now, I am all for cussing, myself, but if the book is supposed to be for young readers I don’t know if this is a great tactic to use.

And, oh, get ready for a lot! of! exclamation! points!

I could go on about how terrible the writing is here, but an astute reader can probably already infer that it doesn’t get better.

I picked this book to read, though, because I do love the subject matter. Some good stories are in here – some I’d read about before, some I hadn’t – and the book does cover women from different time periods and cultures. A few of the topics include women Samurai, pirates, and queens. The author also covers healers (from when women could not officially become doctors), artists, and spiritual leaders.

One inclusion that I found odd was that of goddesses. As these women did not really live, and weren’t mortal humans, their inclusion felt unnecessary. However, if the point of talking about them was to show that some societies worshiped female deities, I guess I could see that as important?

There are some good and fun tidbits in here. If you are truly a young person, or someone who for whatever other reason has never read about women warriors or leaders, this might be a good intro to these topics. If you are an adult, and want to find detailed and well-written stories of women in history, I’m sure you could do better than this one.

I read this one through Reedsy Discovery, and my review also appears there.

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